So You Have Problems

From the Desk of Clearissa Coward’s Command Center

So You Have Problems

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We are all faced with problems throughout our lives, some are small, others huge. Depending on how we deal with them, they can be overwhelming and devastate our lives, or they can quickly fade into the past. It all depends on how we deal with our problems.

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Attitude plays a big role in how we weather a personal storm in our lives. However, there are steps you can use to cut that huge problem into bite-sized pieces and make it easier to digest.

What to do: 

  1. With a difficult personal or work-related issue, consider all viewpoints, even those you may think are not appropriate. Sometimes a new perspective is exactly what is needed to provide relief from a situation that may appear insurmountable.
  2. Do not make the problem larger than it truly is, which is often a panic reaction. Discuss your options with a friend or family member whose opinion you trust. Doing this can sometimes provide just the outlook you need and can be an instant stress reliever.
  3. Create a process to help you figure out what you can do to fix the issue. Do know that sometimes an issue is out of your hands and there is not much, if anything, you can do except ride it out. However, if there is something you can do, list your options. I have found that seeing it on paper makes it less intimidating and more realistic. And once you have made a decision or done all you can do call it done, and leave it alone.  If everything that can be done has been done then it is time to let it go.
  4. We can get bogged down in a problem if we do not plan our way out of it. We must have a destination or finish line set so that we have something to work toward. Having a goal or a clear destination helps us to stay the course.
  5. I also like deadlines when possible. I realize deadlines aren’t appropriate for all issues, but when a deadline is appropriate, create one.  And set your mind to meeting the deadline and letting it go. Be kind to yourself and recognize when you cannot change something and once you reach your deadline, whether to your liking or not, consider if the issue is worth any more of your time, worry, or heartbreak. If not, move on.
  6. Rejection can be an unpleasant experience in any situation, but it just lets us know that we are not perfect. Who is? Consider it a lesson learned, then forget it and move on with your life in a positive and constructive manner. The best revenge for someone who rejects you is to live a positive, successful and happy life. Use rejection as a propeller for better things. Do not allow anyone else to dictate your mood, how you view the world, or your path in life.
  7. Be kind to yourself. When you are going through a problem, remember the importance of self-care. Take time to meditate, pray, or whatever you believe in. Also, exercise, eating right, or treat yourself to a massage or yoga class. And for goodness sake, get lots of rest. Do not stay up all night worrying about the issue. That will get you nothing but bags under your eyes, an irritable mood, and a sleep-deprived day when you greet the next day. Whatever makes you feel confident and better about yourself…do it!


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The steps to dealing with a difficult problem can be broken down as follows:

  1. Get all the facts
  2. Describe the problem in detail
  3. List all the possible solutions
  4. List the advantages and disadvantages of each
  5. Detail what you will do
  6. Follow-through
  7. Be kind to yourself

“What we have to learn to do, we learn by doing.” – Aristotle (BC)


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Until next time…Find And Remain In Your Own Personal Element – Hugs & Blessings!

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12 thoughts on “So You Have Problems

  1. Karren Haller says:

    This is a great message, for me the last 7 months has been an eye-opener on dealing with issues. I think your thought on self-care hits home with me since I was a caregiver for so many years, now I need to do things that will help me care for myself, improve my health and fitness and build a new life.
    Thank you for hosting #omhgww.
    I hope you have a great week!

  2. Clearissa Coward says:

    Hi Karren, A lot of people, I used to be one, believe self-care is selfish. However, I have learned that you must take care of self or you will have nothing to give the ones you love. Take care of you and thank you for stopping in.

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  6. alice says:

    Thank you for this Clearissa! I like the idea of writing things down and talking to someone else about an issue that may be devistating at the moment. Talking about things with someone that can help you can give you a different view point and that person can point out things you may not have seen as possible choices.

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